What COVID Taught Me

25 Dec What COVID Taught Me

In this holiday season of thankfulness and giving, I would be remised to not share what gifts COVID bestowed on me. I know in a year that has been so challenging it may be hard to see the good. If you would simply bear with me, as a share my perspective, perhaps you too can find the good in this year. Here are some of the lesson that COVID taught me.

• Slow Down – Prior to March 14, 2020 my life was go, go, go. Between work, accruing hours for licensure as an Associate Social Worker, my role as an instructor, laying the groundwork for my own passions (Hello Self-Care Advocacy!) and responsibilities to my family and friends, I nearly had to write down everything to keep up. Planning is essential but in hindsight the obsession with busy was detrimental. There is no reason for ANYBODY, to consume their entire day with so much stuff that they don’t make time to be still. It is in the stillness that you can focus on what is truly important. It is where you can see visions manifest and when you are most connected spiritually. And for me, that is when I hear the Lord speaking. Who knew a pandemic would be the eye opener?

• Wants vs. Needs – Routine visits to the nail shop, getting my hair done, new sneakers, another pair of jeans, another blouse and expensive dinners was far from what I needed so frequently but somehow ended up on my list of “needs”. I try to create a necessity fund and a miscellaneous fund monthly, to ensure I stay within my budget. Oftentimes, my miscellaneous spending would take up both my needs and wants budget. As I cleaned out my closet (btw, it’s time to do another purge) I asked myself how may pairs of jeans can you really wear? Do you really need this many black pants? In assessing my spending, despite the employment changes I experienced, in the last year I was still able to save. This is not to suggest that you shouldn’t treat yourself, but adequately assess what your wants and needs are. I had way too many wants.

• Using What I Have – As I adjusted to the “new normal” of working from home, my love of cooking and being creative in the kitchen resurfaced. I tried new meals, some fancier and some more experimental than others. I didn’t frequent the grocery store as much to reduce possible exposure to the Coronavirus, which also attributed to my creativity. I stopped focusing on how a meal had been previously. My chicken alfredo did not have to be made with fettuccine noodles. I created some of my own sauces because I didn’t want to go to the store. I substituted meat (you know meat was hard to get your hands on the first few months of the pandemic) for vegetables, beans, or yams. I even tried breakfast enchiladas. They were delicious. Making do with what I already had, expanded my pallet, forced me to think outside of the box and less food was thrown out to the garbage at the end of the week because I used what I had.

• The Importance of Family Time – I’ve always been big on family. However, the slowing down allowed me to make more time and I don’t believe there is a such thing as too much. We sat and had dinner together. Eating together is a childhood memory, and we were able to do that in this season. Although many miles apart, my sisters and my mom and I were able to have happy hours via Zoom. Due to COVID my nephew’s rigorous athletic schedules decreased, which meant more time with my niece and nephews. We’ve had family game nights, movie nights, karaoke nights. These are moments I wouldn’t have had if it weren’t for the novel virus.

• Have Compassion – We all have been put in the ring and whether we were ready for the punches or not, life just pitched a “Good Luck” and we have been just making our way. Amid a global pandemic and the many stressors linked to COVID-19 such as depression, anxiety, loneliness, loss of employment, and grief to say the least, people are struggling and how we respond to these stressors vary. In conjunction with the pandemic there was a historical election and the pressing social justice concerns. With that said, kindness goes a long way. You never know what someone is going through and a simple smile, hello, thank you, listening or just a little patience can show the compassion that someone may need to get them through their day.

• Gratitude – I mentioned grief. When we think of grief, we generally think of death. However, loss of any kind is grief. Loss of a relationship, a job, friendships, change in routine etc. What I noticed is that sometimes we become so consumed with what “was”, that we lose focus on what is. There is beauty in being present in the moment. In a year of great loss, I have sound mind, I have clean water, I have people I can call, I am employed and blessed to bless others. Remember that this year has been taxing and we are experiencing it together. As you focus on the things that you are grateful for, encourage the people around you to do the same. Having a heart of gratitude can reduce stress which can boost your immune system.

• Black Lives Matter – Just when I thought we (as in humanity, the USA) had come so far, I was reminded that in 2020, the validity of my life, the life of my brother, father, uncles, nephews, cousins, and friends still do not hold the same value as our White counterparts. Twenty, twenty showed me that, despite a pandemic, Black people were coming together, our allies were standing up and speaking out, and this perfect storm promoted collectiveness, a wokeness and change. A change that will not happen overnight but a motivation to continue to push the needle forward.

As we prepare for the new year, I encourage you to practice self-care. Reflect on what you have endured and pat yourself on the back. Practice gratitude by being fully present and focusing on the things that you have and the positive aspects of your life that remain unchanged. Practice social self-care and give back (whether time, resources or financially). Self-Care is what you do for yourself, your loved ones, and your community.  Take care, we are in this together.